Discovering that one has alters (distinct personalities) due to a dissociative disorder like Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) or Other Specified Dissociative Disorder (OSDD) can be a profound and challenging experience. Reactions to this discovery can vary widely from person to person, depending on individual factors, past experiences, and the level of awareness they had about their condition before the realization. Here are some common reactions a person might have when they discover they have alters:
Shock and Denial: Initially, a person may feel shocked or overwhelmed by the realization that they have distinct identities sharing their consciousness. Denial might be a common reaction as the mind tries to protect itself from accepting such a significant and potentially distressing revelation.
Fear and Confusion: Discovering alters can lead to feelings of fear and confusion. The person may wonder why this is happening and what it means for their identity and sense of self. They may question their sanity or worry about what others might think.
Disbelief and Doubt: It's not uncommon for individuals to doubt the reality of their experiences. They might question whether they are making it up or overanalyzing normal mood fluctuations and behaviors.
Relief: In some cases, a person might feel a sense of relief upon discovering the existence of alters. Understanding why they have been experiencing memory gaps or significant shifts in behavior can provide a sense of clarity and validation for their struggles.
Identity Crisis: The discovery of alters can trigger an identity crisis, as the person grapples with the complexity of having multiple identities within themselves. They may struggle to understand who they are and how the different alters fit into their sense of self.
Emotional Turmoil: The emotional impact of discovering alters can be intense. Feelings of sadness, anger, guilt, shame, and loneliness are common reactions as the person processes their experiences.
Curiosity: As the person begins to explore and understand their alters, they might feel curious about the distinct personalities, their memories, and how they interact with each other.
Seeking Validation and Support: The individual may seek validation from others, especially mental health professionals, friends, or family, to confirm the reality of their experiences and help them make sense of it.
Acceptance and Integration: Over time, with appropriate support and therapy, some individuals may come to accept the presence of their alters and work toward integration or cooperation among them.
It's crucial to remember that the process of discovering and accepting alters can be complex and deeply personal. Professional support from a therapist experienced in dissociative disorders is essential to help the person navigate this journey and address any distressing symptoms or emotions that arise. The therapeutic relationship plays a crucial role in supporting the individual through the process of understanding and integrating their alters, promoting healing and increased internal cooperation.