If you have two last names and your spouse does not wish to change her last name after marriage, you have several options when it comes to naming your children. The most common approaches include:
Hyphenation: You can choose to hyphenate your last names to create a new double-barrelled last name for your children. For example, if your last names are Smith and Johnson, your child's last name could be Smith-Johnson.
Combination: Another option is to combine parts of each of your last names to create a completely new last name for your child. This way, both of your family names are represented in your child's last name. For example, if your last names are Smith and Johnson, your child's last name could be Smitson or Johnsmith.
Using one last name: You can also decide to give your child one of your last names and use it as their sole last name. This could be the last name of the parent who has a stronger connection to their family heritage or other personal reasons.
Double middle names: If you both want to keep your last names intact, you can consider giving your child a combination of both your last names as double middle names. For example, if your last names are Smith and Johnson, your child's name could be First Name Middle Name Smith Johnson.
Alternate last names for each child: Some couples choose to give their children different last names, alternating between the parents' last names for each child.
It's important to have open and respectful communication with your spouse about this decision, as naming your children is a significant aspect of their identity. Take the time to discuss your feelings and preferences openly to arrive at a decision that feels right for both of you and your children. Additionally, check the legal requirements and naming regulations in your country or state to ensure that your chosen option is permissible and correctly documented.