Question

I’m a married woman, that only recently started having feelings for other men in my work place. It is so strong! My husband is an alcoholic who has betrayed me & makes little money. I feel ambivalent towards him now, but we have a kid. What do I do?

Answer 1

Dealing with strong feelings for someone outside your marriage can be challenging, especially when combined with existing issues within the marriage. Here are some steps you might consider:

1. Self-reflection: Take some time to understand your own feelings and emotions. Reflect on why you are developing feelings for someone else and how you feel about your current marriage. Identifying the root causes of these emotions can help you make clearer decisions.

2. Communication: Open and honest communication is vital in any relationship. Consider discussing your feelings and concerns with your husband, expressing your thoughts and emotions about the state of your marriage. It's essential to be honest, even if the conversation is difficult.

3. Seek professional help: Considering the complexity of your situation, it might be beneficial to involve a marriage counselor or therapist. Professional guidance can help both you and your husband address the issues in your marriage and work toward a resolution.

4. Focus on your child: Remember that your child's well-being is crucial. Consider how your decisions may impact them and prioritize their needs as you navigate your situation.

5. Assess the marriage: Take some time to evaluate whether your marriage is salvageable and whether both you and your husband are willing to put in the effort to make positive changes.

6. Set boundaries: If you find it difficult to deal with the feelings for someone else, it's essential to set boundaries to protect your marriage. Limiting interactions with the person you're developing feelings for can help prevent further emotional complications.

7. Personal support: Seek support from friends, family, or a support group to talk about your feelings and thoughts. Having a network of people who can listen and offer advice can be invaluable during challenging times.

Remember that every situation is unique, and it's essential to prioritize your own well-being and happiness. Making significant decisions about your marriage can be emotionally charged, so consider seeking professional help to gain more clarity and guidance in this process. Ultimately, only you can determine what is best for you and your family.