When your ex-girlfriend has a boyfriend but still likes to text you and have you around, it can be a complex situation with various possible explanations. Here are some potential reasons why she might be behaving this way:
Friendship: It's possible that she genuinely values your friendship and sees you as an important person in her life. She may want to maintain a platonic connection and keep you as a friend.
Emotional attachment: If you had a significant and emotional relationship in the past, she might still have feelings for you on some level. These emotions can make it difficult for her to completely let go, even if she's in a new relationship.
Comfort and familiarity: Your presence may provide her with comfort and familiarity, especially if you had a long history together. Being in touch with you might be a way for her to cope with changes in her life or relationship.
Validation: Some individuals seek validation from multiple sources, and staying in touch with an ex can be a way to feel wanted or admired.
Uncertainty: She might be unsure about her feelings or her current relationship. Keeping you around as a friend could be a way for her to explore her emotions and maintain a safety net.
Regret or nostalgia: She may have regrets about the breakup or miss certain aspects of your past relationship, leading her to seek contact with you.
Manipulation: In some cases, people might keep their ex-partners around for manipulative reasons, such as making their current partner jealous or as a backup plan in case their current relationship doesn't work out.
It's essential to assess your own feelings and boundaries in this situation. Consider the following steps:
Communication: If her actions are causing you confusion or discomfort, consider having an open and honest conversation with her. Discuss your feelings and boundaries, and ask her about her intentions.
Set boundaries: Determine what you are comfortable with in your interactions with her. If you feel that her behavior is crossing boundaries or interfering with your emotional well-being, it's essential to establish clear boundaries.
Protect your emotions: Be mindful of how these interactions affect your emotions. If staying in contact with her is causing you distress or preventing you from moving on, it might be necessary to limit or cut off communication for a while.
Focus on your well-being: Concentrate on your personal growth, hobbies, and relationships with other friends and family members. Surround yourself with positive influences and activities that bring you joy.
Consider the context: Take into account her actions in the context of her current relationship. If she is hiding her communication with you from her boyfriend or if her actions seem dishonest, it's essential to be cautious about the situation.
Ultimately, only she can provide clarity on her intentions and feelings. If you find it challenging to navigate this situation on your own, don't hesitate to seek support from friends, family, or a therapist who can help you process your emotions and make decisions that are best for your well-being.