The decision of whether to visit someone in a long-term care facility whom you used to live with is a complex and sensitive matter, and it's not necessarily a question of rudeness. There could be various valid reasons for both visiting and not visiting, depending on the circumstances and the relationship between you and the person in the facility. Here are some factors to consider:
Personal Relationship: Reflect on the nature of your relationship with the person in the long-term care facility. If you had a close bond and a history of caring for each other, visiting could be a thoughtful way to maintain the connection and show that you still care.
Emotional Well-being: Consider your emotional state and the potential impact of the visit on your well-being. If visiting brings up painful memories or creates emotional distress, it's essential to prioritize your own mental health.
Health and Safety: Long-term care facilities might have certain rules or protocols in place to protect the residents' health and safety, particularly during times of infectious diseases or outbreaks. It's essential to respect and abide by these guidelines.
Communication: If you choose not to visit, consider alternative ways to stay in touch or support the person. Regular phone calls, letters, or sending care packages can be meaningful ways to show you care even if you can't visit in person.
Circumstances for the Move: If the person in the facility has moved there due to a falling out or strained relationship between you, it might be best to respect their space and privacy unless they express a desire to reconnect.
Practical Constraints: Sometimes, logistical or geographical constraints might make visiting difficult or impossible. In such cases, communicate your circumstances honestly, and express your regret for not being able to visit in person.
Cultural and Personal Factors: Cultural norms, personal beliefs, or family dynamics can also play a role in the decision-making process. What might be perceived as rude in one cultural context could be considered acceptable in another.
Ultimately, the decision of whether or not to visit someone in a long-term care facility should be based on thoughtful consideration of the individual circumstances, your feelings, and the well-being of both parties involved. If you are unsure, it may be helpful to discuss the situation with a trusted friend, family member, or counselor to gain additional perspective. Regardless of the decision, showing compassion and empathy is essential, and finding alternative ways to express care and support can be just as meaningful as a physical visit.