It's important to recognize that everyone's experiences and emotions are unique, and seeking the guidance of a mental health professional can be very helpful in understanding and processing complex emotions.
The loss of a twin before birth can be a significant event for someone, even if they never had the opportunity to meet their twin in the physical world. The bond between twins can be deep and profound, and the loss of a twin can create a sense of emptiness or longing. It's possible that this early loss has left a lasting impact on you emotionally.
Additionally, feeling a desire for siblings, whether older or younger, is entirely normal. Many people long for the companionship, shared experiences, and support that siblings can provide. As an only child, it's natural to wonder what life might have been like with siblings and to feel a sense of loneliness or longing for those connections.
If you're struggling with feelings of loneliness and the loss of your twin, it might be helpful to talk to someone about your emotions. Consider reaching out to a therapist, counselor, or support group where you can openly discuss your feelings and receive guidance on how to cope with these emotions in a healthy way.
Remember that it's okay to feel what you're feeling, and seeking support can be a positive step in understanding and processing these emotions. You don't have to navigate these feelings alone, and there are resources available to help you on your journey of healing and self-discovery.