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The psychology behind people wanting to live alone but not wanting to be alone once they're actually living alone can be complex and influenced by various factors. Here are some possible explanations:

  1. Autonomy and Independence: Many people desire to live alone because it allows them to have more control over their space, time, and lifestyle. Living alone can provide a sense of autonomy and independence, free from the influence and demands of others. This desire for personal freedom may lead them to seek a solitary living arrangement.

  2. Intimacy and Social Connection: Despite the desire for independence, humans are inherently social beings, and we have a natural need for social interaction and connection. Even introverts or individuals who prefer solitude still require some degree of social contact for emotional well-being and a sense of belonging.

  3. Fear of Loneliness: Once people start living alone, they might experience moments of loneliness or isolation, especially if they haven't built a strong social support system or haven't developed strategies to cope with solitude. This can lead to a desire for social interaction to alleviate feelings of loneliness.

  4. Social Norms and Expectations: Society often values individualism and independence, which can lead people to aspire to live alone as a sign of success or personal achievement. However, societal norms also emphasize the importance of relationships and social bonds, leading individuals to seek companionship and social interactions once they realize that living alone doesn't fully fulfill their emotional needs.

  5. Emotional and Psychological Benefits of Relationships: Human beings derive emotional and psychological benefits from social connections and relationships. Friendships, family ties, and romantic partnerships can provide emotional support, love, a sense of belonging, and validation, which are fundamental to human well-being.

  6. Balance and Flexibility: People might seek a balance between living alone and engaging with others. They may enjoy having their own space and independence but also appreciate the flexibility to spend time with friends, family, or potential romantic partners when they desire companionship.

  7. Variety of Personal Preferences: The desire to live alone but not be alone can also vary depending on an individual's personality, life circumstances, and past experiences. Some people may naturally be more comfortable with solitude, while others may find that they need social interaction to thrive.

In summary, the psychology behind wanting to live alone but not wanting to be alone once living alone can be a delicate interplay of autonomy, social needs, fear of loneliness, societal expectations, emotional benefits of relationships, and individual preferences. Each person's experience will be unique and influenced by a combination of these factors.

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