When someone who has cheated before tells their current partner, "I'll never hurt you or leave you," there could be several reasons for this statement:
Guilt and remorse: The person may genuinely regret their past actions and feel guilty about their past infidelity. As a result, they might be trying to reassure their current partner that they have learned from their mistake and are committed to being faithful and trustworthy in the relationship.
Desire to change: After going through the experience of cheating and its consequences, the individual might have undergone personal growth and self-reflection. They may have realized the pain they caused in the past and genuinely want to change their behavior to become a better partner.
Fear of losing their current partner: The person may fear that their partner will leave them if they find out about their past infidelity. By making such promises, they hope to avoid losing the person they care about and want to regain their partner's trust.
Manipulation or deception: Unfortunately, some people may use promises like these as a way to manipulate their current partner emotionally. They might be saying what they think their partner wants to hear to keep them in the relationship while still being dishonest or prone to repeating their past behavior.
Insecurity and low self-esteem: If the person struggles with self-esteem issues or feelings of inadequacy, they may make these promises as a way to seek validation and assurance from their partner.
Wanting a fresh start: By making such promises, the person might be trying to create a new beginning in their relationship, leaving their past mistakes behind and building a stronger foundation for the future.
Regardless of the reasons behind the statement, it's crucial for both partners to communicate openly and honestly about their feelings and concerns. If there is a history of infidelity, rebuilding trust can be a challenging process that requires effort from both individuals involved. Professional couples counseling can be beneficial in navigating such situations, fostering healthy communication, and addressing any underlying issues that may have contributed to the infidelity in the first place.