Whether it's considered rude or not depends on cultural and personal perspectives. In some cultures or families, discussing personal matters like having children is seen as normal and well-intentioned, while in others, it may be considered intrusive and inappropriate.
Here are a few things to consider:
Cultural context: In some cultures, discussing family planning and asking about having children is considered a common topic of conversation and shows genuine interest and concern for the well-being of family members. It may not be intended to be rude but rather a way to express care.
Personal boundaries: On the other hand, some individuals prefer to keep their personal matters, such as family planning, private. In such cases, the question might be perceived as intrusive and rude, as it delves into their private life.
Timing and manner: The way the question is asked and the timing of it can also affect how it is perceived. If it's brought up in a sensitive and respectful manner, it might be better received than if it feels pushy or judgmental.
Family dynamics: The relationship between family members also plays a role. If there's a close and open relationship with good communication, discussing such matters might be more acceptable. However, if there are strained relations or unresolved issues, the question might be viewed as insensitive.
In any case, it's essential to be mindful of others' feelings and boundaries. If you feel uncomfortable with the question, it's okay to politely deflect or change the subject. Responding with something like, "We're focusing on other aspects of our life right now," or "We'll let you know when we have news to share," can help set a boundary without causing any conflict.
Ultimately, everyone's feelings and sensitivities differ, so it's crucial to approach these conversations with empathy and respect. If the situation persists and makes you uncomfortable, consider having a private conversation with the family member expressing your feelings, so they understand your perspective.