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To politely tell someone not to order for you in a restaurant, you can use a respectful and assertive approach. Here are some steps to consider:

  1. Maintain a calm and friendly tone: Avoid sounding confrontational or defensive, as it might create unnecessary tension.

  2. Express appreciation: Begin by thanking the person for their offer or intention to order for you. This helps set a positive tone for the conversation.

  3. Explain your preference: Politely and clearly explain that you would prefer to order for yourself. You can say something like, "Thank you so much for offering to order for me, but I'd actually prefer to order for myself."

  4. Offer a reason (optional): You can provide a reason for wanting to order for yourself, though this is not necessary. For example, you could say, "I like to make sure I get exactly what I'm in the mood for" or "I have some dietary preferences I'd like to consider."

  5. Be firm but kind: If the person insists or seems to take offense, gently but firmly reiterate your preference. For instance, you could say, "I appreciate your gesture, but I really prefer to order for myself. It's just a personal preference."

  6. Shift the focus: If the situation becomes awkward, try to shift the focus to something else, like discussing the menu or asking for their recommendations on certain dishes. This can help ease any discomfort and transition the conversation smoothly.

  7. Show understanding: Show understanding and empathy for their initial offer, so they don't feel rejected or hurt. You can say something like, "I know you meant well, and I appreciate that."

Remember, it's entirely reasonable to want to order for yourself, and most people will respect your decision once you communicate it politely. Being clear and assertive about your preferences is essential for healthy communication in any situation.

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