Dealing with a situation where your adult daughter points out your raised shoulders and makes comments can be challenging, especially if there is a history of abuse and tension between you. Here are some suggestions on how to respond to this situation:
Stay Calm and Grounded: When your daughter makes comments about your posture, try to stay calm and grounded. Take a deep breath before responding to avoid escalating the situation.
Express Your Feelings: If you feel comfortable doing so, calmly express how her comments make you feel. Let her know that you find it hurtful or uncomfortable, and that you would appreciate it if she refrains from making such comments.
Set Boundaries: If her comments continue despite your request, consider setting boundaries around the topic. Let her know that you prefer not to discuss your posture or other sensitive subjects during your time together.
Address the Abuse: If there is a history of abuse, it's essential to address it. Consider seeking professional help, such as therapy or counseling, to work through the underlying issues and improve your relationship.
Focus on Positive Topics: During your time together, try to steer the conversation towards more positive and enjoyable topics. Engaging in activities or discussions that bring joy to both of you can help improve the atmosphere.
Limit Exposure if Necessary: If the tension and negative comments persist despite your efforts, you may need to consider limiting your exposure to situations where such behavior occurs. It's essential to prioritize your well-being and emotional health.
Seek Support: Reach out to friends, family, or support groups to share your experiences and gain insight from others who may have dealt with similar situations.
Practice Self-Care: Take care of yourself emotionally and physically. Engage in activities that help you relax and reduce stress.
Give It Time: Healing and improving strained relationships take time. Be patient with yourself and your daughter as you work towards a healthier dynamic.
Remember, addressing issues in relationships can be challenging, and it's okay to seek professional help if needed. Focus on fostering open communication, understanding, and empathy to create a more positive and supportive environment for both of you.