Conversations like these are always difficult and emotional, and the right words depend heavily on the specifics of the situation. However, here are some general guidelines for what you might say:
Express your feelings: It's okay to let the person know that you're hurt and confused. It's better to be honest about your feelings than to keep them bottled up. Something like, "I feel really hurt and confused right now because I still care deeply about you."
Ask for clarity: If it's not clear why the person's feelings have changed, you might ask for clarification. Keep in mind, though, that they might not fully understand their feelings themselves, or they might not want to discuss it.
Respect their feelings: Acknowledge that you cannot control how someone else feels. You could say something like, "I understand that feelings change and it's not something we can always control."
Discuss the future: If you've been in a committed relationship with this person, it's important to discuss what this means for your future. This could involve talking about practical matters (like shared belongings or living arrangements), or emotional ones (like whether you can or should remain friends).
Show gratitude: Even in painful situations, it can be helpful to express gratitude for the positive aspects of your relationship. For example, "Despite how painful this is, I'm grateful for the times we shared and I've learned a lot from our relationship."
Seek support: Let them know that you'll need some time and space to process this, and that you'll be reaching out to other loved ones for support.
Remember, these are just guidelines, and the specifics of your conversation should be tailored to your individual relationship and circumstances. It's important to approach the conversation with empathy, respect, and a willingness to listen.