I'm sorry to hear about your date's loss. It's a challenging and sensitive situation, and your support and consideration can make a difference during this difficult time. Here are some suggestions on how to comfort her:
Express your condolences: Send her a thoughtful and heartfelt message expressing your sympathy for her loss. Let her know that you are there for her if she needs someone to talk to or lean on.
Give her space: Grieving is a personal process, and people cope with loss in different ways. Respect her need for space and time to process her feelings. Let her know you're available if she wants to talk but also understand if she needs some time alone.
Offer practical help: If appropriate, offer specific assistance, such as helping with errands, cooking meals, or any other practical tasks that might be overwhelming for her during this time.
Listen with empathy: If she wants to talk about her feelings or memories related to her father, be a good listener. Show empathy and understanding without trying to offer solutions or minimize her grief.
Send a sympathy card or flowers: A small gesture like sending a sympathy card or flowers can show that you care and are thinking of her during this difficult time.
Regarding attending the funeral, this can be a more complicated decision. Since you've only had five dates with her, you may not have established a deep emotional connection yet. Attending a funeral is a very personal and intimate event, and it's essential to consider her feelings and preferences in this matter.
If you feel like your relationship is at a stage where it would be appropriate and welcomed, you can express your desire to attend the funeral to support her. However, be understanding and respect her decision if she would rather have close family and friends present. Grieving can be overwhelming, and she may prefer to be surrounded by those she is closest to at this time.
Ultimately, the most important thing is to be kind, compassionate, and supportive while respecting her boundaries during this challenging time.