Feeling hurt or sensitive when someone tells you that you talk too much is a common human reaction, and there are several reasons why this might be the case:
Need for validation: Being social creatures, humans often seek validation and acceptance from others. When someone criticizes the way we communicate, it can trigger feelings of rejection or not being understood, leading to hurt emotions.
Fear of rejection: Being told that you talk too much may trigger a fear of rejection or a fear of not being liked by others. It can create a sense of vulnerability and make you question your social skills or self-worth.
Self-awareness and self-doubt: If you genuinely value your relationships with others, you might become more self-aware about your communication habits. This increased self-awareness can lead to self-doubt and overthinking, making you cautious about speaking up again.
Social expectations: Social norms and expectations influence our behavior. Being told that you talk too much can make you feel like you are not meeting the expected standards of conversation, leading to feelings of inadequacy.
Miscommunication or misunderstanding: Sometimes, when someone points out that you talk too much, it might be a misunderstanding or miscommunication on their part. However, it can still be hurtful, as it challenges your perception of how you interact with others.
Previous experiences: Past experiences, such as being criticized for talking too much in childhood or other settings, can create emotional triggers that resurface when you face a similar situation.
It's essential to remember that everyone has different communication styles and preferences. Just because someone says you talk too much doesn't necessarily mean that you are inherently annoying or unworthy of being heard. Healthy communication involves understanding and respecting each other's boundaries and preferences.
If you find yourself holding back from speaking because of this fear, it might be helpful to work on building your self-confidence and self-acceptance. Additionally, open and honest communication with the person who made the comment could help clarify their perspective and reduce misunderstandings.
Remember that it's okay to have things to say and contribute to conversations. Find people who appreciate your communication style and value what you have to say. Surrounding yourself with supportive and understanding individuals can make a significant difference in how you feel about your interactions with others. If this issue significantly impacts your self-esteem or relationships, consider seeking support from friends, family, or even a therapist.