It's perfectly reasonable to prefer that people call before visiting, as drop-in visitors can be disruptive and inconvenient. Here are some steps you can take to encourage people to call before coming over:
Communicate your preferences: Talk openly with your friends, family, and acquaintances about your preference for advance notice before visits. Let them know that you have a busy schedule or other commitments, and that calling ahead helps you plan better.
Set boundaries: Establish clear boundaries regarding when it's acceptable for people to visit and when it's not. For example, you could let them know that weekdays are generally not ideal for drop-ins due to work, but weekends are more flexible.
Update your voicemail or answering machine: If you have a landline or a cellphone with voicemail, create a personalized message kindly requesting callers to let you know in advance if they plan to visit.
Use social media or messaging platforms: Share your preference for advance notice on social media or messaging platforms where your friends and family are connected. This way, your request reaches a wider audience.
Send gentle reminders: If you have friends or family who tend to drop by unannounced, consider sending them a friendly reminder every now and then about your preference for calls before visits.
Be understanding: While it's essential to communicate your preference, also be understanding of occasional drop-in visits that may happen despite your request. People might forget or have urgent matters to discuss.
Regarding turning people away, it's essential to handle the situation with tact and consideration. While it's okay to politely decline an unexpected visit if you are not prepared or available, try to do so graciously. Here are some tips:
Remain polite and composed: Even if you are caught off guard, stay courteous and composed when declining the visit.
Explain the situation briefly: Provide a simple explanation of why it's not a good time for a visit, such as having other commitments or needing some personal space.
Offer an alternative time: Suggest another time that would be more convenient for a visit, so the person doesn't feel rejected outright.
Express appreciation: Thank the person for their thoughtfulness in wanting to visit and express that you look forward to meeting with them at the agreed-upon time.
Use humor if appropriate: A light-hearted joke can help ease any potential awkwardness in the situation.
Remember that occasional drop-in visits might still happen despite your efforts, but setting boundaries and communicating your preferences can significantly reduce their frequency. It's important to find a balance between being considerate of others' feelings and asserting your need for personal space and privacy.