Feeling like everything you need and want in life is dependent on certain people who want to be friends and the way they treat you can be a difficult and frustrating experience. It seems like you might be placing a lot of importance on the approval and acceptance of these individuals, which can lead to feelings of vulnerability and dependency. There could be several reasons for this perception:
Emotional Attachment: You might have formed strong emotional attachments to these individuals, and their validation or approval may have become crucial to your self-esteem and well-being.
Fear of Rejection: The fear of being rejected or abandoned by these people could be causing you to rely heavily on their approval and friendship to feel secure.
Social Validation: Sometimes, we seek validation and acceptance from others as a way to confirm our own worth. If these individuals are significant in your social circle, their acceptance may seem essential for feeling valued.
Limited Social Circle: If you have a small social circle or struggle to make new connections, you might unconsciously place more importance on the relationships you do have.
Past Experiences: Previous experiences, such as rejection or feeling left out, could be influencing your current feelings and attitudes towards friendship and acceptance.
However, it's important to remember that your worth and happiness should not solely depend on the validation of others. Building a healthy sense of self-worth and independence is crucial for personal growth and fulfillment.
Here are some steps you can take to address these feelings:
Self-Reflection: Take some time to reflect on why you might be placing such significance on these specific friendships. Understand your emotions and motivations better.
Diversify Your Connections: Try to broaden your social circle and make new connections. Join clubs, classes, or groups that interest you, and you might find like-minded individuals who can become supportive friends.
Focus on Self-Improvement: Concentrate on personal growth, pursuing your passions, and achieving your goals. Building confidence and self-reliance will reduce your dependency on others for validation.
Set Boundaries: Make sure you have clear boundaries in your friendships and relationships. It's essential to be treated with respect and kindness, and if someone consistently mistreats you, it may be time to reevaluate the friendship.
Seek Professional Help: If you find that these feelings are significantly impacting your well-being and relationships, consider talking to a therapist or counselor. They can provide guidance and support in navigating these emotions.
Remember, true friendships should be based on mutual respect, support, and care. It's essential to surround yourself with people who uplift you and contribute positively to your life. Ultimately, your happiness and fulfillment come from within, and building a strong sense of self will help you navigate life's challenges more effectively.