It's essential to approach this situation with empathy and an understanding that people's motivations can be complex and influenced by various factors. While I cannot know the specific circumstances of your best friend's advice, there are a few possible reasons why someone might suggest lowering their standards or getting with less attractive partners:
Concern for your happiness: Your best friend might believe that by lowering your standards, you could be more likely to find a partner and experience romantic happiness. They may see you struggling to find someone who meets your perceived high standards and think that being less selective will lead to a better outcome.
Fear of you being single: Some people worry about their friends being single for extended periods, especially if they themselves are in relationships. They may think that by being less picky, you increase your chances of finding a partner and won't feel left out or lonely.
Personal bias or insecurity: Your best friend's advice might be influenced by their own experiences or insecurities. They may feel threatened or inadequate if you are in a relationship with someone they perceive as more attractive, so they might encourage you to choose partners they consider "less attractive" to avoid this potential issue.
Lack of understanding of your preferences: Your best friend might not fully grasp or appreciate your specific preferences, values, and what you seek in a partner. As a result, they might suggest what they believe is a more practical approach, not realizing that it may not align with your true desires.
Societal pressures: Cultural or societal norms can sometimes lead people to believe that they should prioritize certain qualities over others when choosing a partner. This could include factors like attractiveness, financial status, or social status, which might be influencing your best friend's advice.
Communication style: Sometimes, people offer advice without fully understanding its impact. Your best friend might be trying to provide what they think is practical advice without realizing that it can be hurtful or unsupportive.
It's essential to remember that you have the right to set your own standards and choose partners based on what you find important and fulfilling. While it's okay to listen to the perspectives of friends and loved ones, ultimately, the decision on whom you date or enter a relationship with is yours to make.
If you feel comfortable, consider having an open and honest conversation with your best friend about how their advice makes you feel. Share your perspective, preferences, and what you value in a partner. True friends will respect your feelings and choices, even if they might have different opinions. Healthy friendships involve supporting each other's autonomy and decisions while providing constructive and understanding feedback.