It's unfortunate when financial matters impact friendships, but it's essential to address the situation with empathy and understanding. Here are some steps you can take to handle this delicate situation:
Give it some time: If your friend has stopped speaking to you, emotions might be running high. It's best to give both of you some time to cool off before attempting to address the issue.
Reach out with empathy: Once some time has passed, reach out to your friend with empathy and understanding. You can say something like, "I noticed we haven't been talking lately, and I wanted to check in to see how you're doing."
Express your feelings: Share your feelings honestly but calmly. Let your friend know that you value your friendship, but the situation has been challenging for you too. You can say, "I care about our friendship, and it hurt me that our relationship was affected by the loan issue."
Discuss the loan situation: If your friend brings up the loan issue, be open to discussing it. Explain your reasons for declining the request and your concerns about the previous loan experience.
Set boundaries: It's essential to establish clear boundaries when it comes to lending money between friends. Let your friend know how you feel about lending money in the future and what you expect in terms of repayment if you decide to lend again.
Listen to their perspective: Be willing to listen to your friend's side of the story. They might be going through a difficult time and feeling stressed about finances, which could be contributing to their reaction.
Consider the overall friendship: Reflect on the overall dynamics of your friendship. Has this issue exposed deeper underlying problems in the relationship, or is it just a temporary setback?
Focus on the positive: Remind your friend of the positive aspects of your friendship and the experiences you've shared. Let them know that you value the bond you have and hope to resolve any issues.
Offer alternative support: If you genuinely want to help your friend, consider offering support in non-monetary ways. Perhaps you can help them brainstorm solutions, offer emotional support, or assist in finding resources that could aid them.
Give it time and space: Sometimes, it takes time for emotions to settle and for both parties to process their feelings. Be patient and give your friend the space they need to sort through their thoughts.
Ultimately, it's essential to communicate openly, honestly, and respectfully. Understand that friendships can have ups and downs, and resolving conflicts takes time and effort from both sides. However, if your friend remains unwilling to communicate or work through the issue, you might need to accept that the friendship may have changed or evolved.