Discovering that your best friend (BFF) went behind your back and dated your friend with benefits can be a hurtful and challenging situation. Here are some steps to consider taking:
Process your emotions: Allow yourself to feel the full range of emotions that come with this situation - hurt, betrayal, anger, disappointment, etc. Take some time to process your feelings before deciding how to proceed.
Communicate with your BFF: When you're ready, try to have an open and honest conversation with your best friend. Avoid accusing or attacking language, but express how their actions made you feel and why you're hurt by what happened. Listen to their side of the story as well, as there may be misunderstandings or factors you are unaware of.
Consider the context: Assess the situation and the nature of your relationship with your friend with benefits. Were you both open about your feelings for each other? Was there an understanding that it was a casual arrangement or something more? Understanding the context can help you make a more informed decision.
Evaluate your boundaries: Reflect on whether you had set clear boundaries with your BFF about your friend with benefits. If you didn't explicitly communicate your feelings or desires regarding this person, it might be an opportunity to learn from this experience and express your boundaries more clearly in the future.
Assess the impact on your friendship: Consider the significance of your friendship with your BFF and how much this incident has affected it. If this is a one-time mistake and you value the friendship deeply, you may be able to work through it with open communication and forgiveness.
Take care of yourself: During this difficult time, prioritize self-care. Surround yourself with supportive friends and family, engage in activities that bring you joy, and seek out hobbies or interests that help you take your mind off the situation temporarily.
Forgiveness and moving forward: If you choose to forgive your BFF and work through the situation, it's essential to set boundaries moving forward. Discuss openly about respecting each other's feelings and ensure better communication in the future.
Reevaluate the friend with benefits situation: This incident might also be an opportunity to reassess your involvement with the friend with benefits. If this person was meaningful to you, reflect on whether you want to continue the relationship or end it to avoid further complications.
Seek support: If you find it challenging to cope with the situation on your own, don't hesitate to seek support from a trusted friend, family member, or even a therapist. Talking to someone neutral can provide valuable insights and emotional support.
Remember, everyone's situation is unique, and there's no one-size-fits-all answer. Trust your instincts and do what feels right for you, taking into consideration both your emotions and the value you place on the relationships involved.