It's not uncommon for parents or older generations to offer advice or guidance on parenting matters, even when it comes to your own child. Sometimes, this behavior is well-intentioned, and they may genuinely believe they are helping. However, it can also be frustrating or feel intrusive, especially when it comes to decisions about your own child.
There could be several reasons why your father feels he can tell you what to do with your child:
Parental instincts: As a parent, your father might believe he has valuable insights into parenting, based on his own experiences raising you and your siblings.
Concern for your sibling: Your father might believe that letting your child play with your younger sister is essential for fostering family bonds and encouraging interaction among family members.
Traditional beliefs: In some families, there may be cultural or generational norms where elders are seen as authority figures, and their opinions are highly regarded.
Protective instincts: Your father might think he knows what's best for your child and wants to ensure that they are in a safe and suitable environment.
Regardless of his intentions, it's essential to establish boundaries and open lines of communication. Here are some steps you can take:
Express your feelings: Calmly and respectfully communicate with your father about your desire to spend time with your child. Share your feelings and thoughts about how you want to be involved in your child's activities.
Set boundaries: Let your father know that while you value his input, you also need the space and autonomy to make decisions about your child's activities.
Explain your perspective: Help him understand the importance of your relationship with your child and how you want to be present in their life.
Seek compromise: Find a middle ground that respects both your father's desire for family interaction and your wish to spend time with your child.
Be patient: It might take time for your father to adjust to the idea of you making independent decisions regarding your child. Be patient and consistent in asserting your role as a parent.
Focus on the child's well-being: Emphasize that you are always considering what's best for your child, and your decisions are made with their best interests in mind.
Involve him positively: If possible, involve your father in activities with your child so that he can be a part of their life in a way that feels comfortable for both of you.
Remember that every family dynamic is different, and it's essential to find an approach that works for your specific situation. By maintaining open communication, setting boundaries, and expressing your perspective, you can foster understanding and navigate these situations more effectively.