Telling your mom that your family wants to move out can be a sensitive conversation, especially given the circumstances you've described. To make her feel safe and well about your decision, it's important to approach the conversation with empathy and understanding. Here are some positive and gentle excuses that you can use:
Space for Your Growing Family: You can explain that as your family has grown over the past three years, you find yourselves needing more space to accommodate everyone's needs and ensure that everyone has enough personal space.
New Opportunities: Emphasize that the move presents an exciting opportunity for your family, such as being closer to a new job, school, or a supportive community that will benefit your family's future.
Financial Independence: If you're in a position to afford your own place, you can explain that moving out will help your family achieve a sense of financial independence and responsibility.
Seeking New Experiences: Express that you and your husband see this move as an opportunity to explore a new neighborhood, environment, or lifestyle, and that you believe it will be a positive and enriching experience for everyone.
Privacy and Autonomy: Stress the importance of privacy and autonomy for your family, as you believe having your own space will allow each member to develop and thrive independently while maintaining a close relationship with your mom.
Positive Memories: Reassure your mom that the three years you've lived with her have been precious and full of beautiful memories that you will always cherish. Moving out does not diminish the love and appreciation you have for her.
Visits and Family Time: Make it clear that moving out doesn't mean you won't visit or spend time together as a family. Reassure her that you'll make a concerted effort to stay connected and maintain the bond you share.
Reducing Tensions: Acknowledge the conflicts that have arisen between your husband and mom. Explain that moving out is a step you're taking to reduce tensions and create a more harmonious living situation for everyone involved.
Thankfulness and Gratitude: Express your gratitude for the love and support she has provided during these three years. Let her know that her presence in your lives is invaluable and that the move is not a reflection of any dissatisfaction with her or her home.
Consider Her Feelings: Encourage an open and honest conversation about her feelings regarding your decision. Listen to her concerns, and validate her emotions. Let her know that you understand this might be an adjustment for her as well.
Remember to be patient and compassionate during the conversation. Transitions like this can be emotional for all parties involved, and it's important to show understanding and support for your mom's feelings while also asserting the needs of your own family.