First of all, it's important to acknowledge that having mixed feelings or uncertainty about new family dynamics is entirely normal and doesn't make you homophobic. Adjusting to significant life changes, such as adoption and having two dads, can take time, and it's okay to have questions and feelings about it.
Here are some suggestions to help you get used to having two dads and navigate this new chapter in your life:
Give yourself time: Remember that adjusting to a new family structure can be a process. Allow yourself the time and space to understand your feelings and emotions.
Open communication: Talk to your dads about your feelings and concerns. They may have gone through similar experiences when they first became parents. Honest communication can help build understanding and support.
Education and exposure: If you feel unsure about explaining your family situation to others, educating yourself about diverse family structures and LGBTQ+ issues can be helpful. This knowledge can boost your confidence when discussing your family with others.
Choose your audience: You don't have to explain your family situation to everyone you meet. Decide whom you feel comfortable sharing this information with and take your time sharing it.
Practice sharing: If you want to be open about your family, practice explaining it to close friends or supportive people in your life first. This can help you gain confidence in sharing your story.
Support groups or counseling: If you find that you need additional support, consider seeking guidance from a counselor or joining a support group for adopted children or those with LGBTQ+ parents. These groups can offer valuable insights and a safe space to share your experiences.
Celebrate your family: Focus on the love and support your dads provide rather than the labels or judgments others may impose. Embrace the unique aspects of your family and the opportunity to grow and learn from different perspectives.
Remember, it's completely normal to have mixed emotions about big changes in your life. Embrace your family for the love and care they offer, and take your time adjusting to the new dynamics. Seeking support from understanding friends, family, or professionals can make the transition smoother. You are not alone in this, and over time, you may find that you become more comfortable and confident in sharing your family story.