Question

How do I get my dad to call me by my first name? I have never been called any name it’s only Can you come do the dishes not Lucy can you come do the dishes. He calls my siblings by their names. How do I talk to him about this?

Answer 1

It's understandable that you would like your dad to call you by your first name, just like he does with your siblings. Here are some steps you can take to address this issue and have a conversation with him:

1. Choose the right time and place: Find a calm and private moment to talk to your dad. Avoid bringing it up during tense or busy times, as it may not be the most receptive moment for a conversation.

2. Express your feelings: Approach the conversation with a respectful and open attitude. Let your dad know that you have something important you'd like to discuss and that it's about how he addresses you.

3. Be honest and clear: Share your feelings with him openly. Let him know that it would mean a lot to you if he called you by your first name, just like he does with your siblings. You can explain that using your name makes you feel seen, acknowledged, and respected.

4. Ask for his perspective: Inquire about why he might not call you by your name and whether there's any particular reason for it. Sometimes, it could be unintentional, and he may not even realize he's doing it differently.

5. Avoid blaming or accusing: Keep the conversation focused on how you feel and what you would like, rather than accusing him of anything. Use "I" statements to express your emotions, such as "I feel more included when you use my name."

6. Offer understanding: Show empathy and understanding if your dad explains any reasons for not using your name. It's possible that he has a habit or a reason that you might not be aware of.

7. Request a change: Kindly ask if he could make an effort to use your name when addressing you in the future. Sometimes, gentle reminders may be necessary if it's a habit he's used to.

8. Be patient: Change takes time, and it might take a while for your dad to get used to calling you by your name. Be patient and give him the space to adjust.

Remember, the key is to have an open and respectful conversation. Sometimes people may not realize the impact of their words or actions, and by bringing it up in a non-confrontational manner, you increase the chances of resolving the issue positively.