Dealing with a situation like this can be incredibly challenging and emotionally distressing. Here are some steps you can consider taking to address the issue:
Express your feelings: Continue communicating with your mom about how her actions are affecting you emotionally. Share your concerns and emotions calmly, emphasizing that you care about her well-being and the impact this affair is having on the family.
Seek support: Talk to someone you trust, such as a close friend or family member, about what you're going through. Having a supportive confidant can help you process your feelings and provide some guidance.
Consider counseling or therapy: If you find it challenging to cope with the situation on your own, consider seeking professional help. A therapist can offer an objective perspective and provide strategies to navigate this difficult situation.
Set boundaries for yourself: While you can express your concerns to your mom, ultimately, her actions are beyond your control. Focus on setting emotional boundaries to protect your well-being and avoid getting overly involved in their relationship.
Understand her perspective: While you may not agree with her choices, try to understand why she might be involved with your late dad's friend. People grieve and cope with loss differently, and she may be seeking companionship or solace.
Reach out to your late dad's friend: If you have a close relationship with your late dad's friend, consider talking to him privately about your feelings and the impact of his actions on your family. However, approach this conversation with caution and respect.
Explore alternative living arrangements: If the situation becomes unbearable and affects your well-being, consider finding a way to move out and live independently or with other family members or friends.
Practice self-care: Take care of yourself during this challenging time. Engage in activities that bring you joy and help you manage stress.
Acceptance and forgiveness: While it's difficult, try to find a way to accept the situation and forgive your mom for her actions. This doesn't mean condoning her behavior, but it can help you find some peace within yourself.
Give it time: Relationships and emotions are complex, and change may not happen overnight. Continue to support and love your mom while also focusing on your well-being.
Remember that you can't control your mom's actions, but you can choose how you respond and take care of yourself in the process. It might be helpful to consider seeking guidance from a professional counselor to navigate through these difficult emotions and decisions.