It sounds like your boyfriend is displaying signs of insecurity and possessiveness, and his behavior is not healthy for your relationship. Trust is a fundamental aspect of any successful relationship, and his constant questioning and checking on your past indicate a lack of trust, which can be detrimental to the well-being of both partners.
Here are some steps you can consider taking in this situation:
Communication: Have an open and honest conversation with your boyfriend about how his behavior is affecting you. Express your feelings calmly and clearly, and let him know that you value trust and want a relationship built on mutual respect.
Set Boundaries: Establish boundaries regarding privacy and personal space. Let him know that you expect to be trusted and respected, and that constant questioning and checking on your past is not acceptable.
Encourage Self-Reflection: Suggest that he reflects on the reasons behind his insecurities and trust issues. This may involve personal introspection or even seeking the help of a therapist to work through these feelings.
Reinforce Trust: Reassure your boyfriend of your commitment to the relationship and your loyalty. However, it's important to remember that you shouldn't have to constantly prove your fidelity. Trust should be the foundation of the relationship.
Encourage Professional Help: If his behavior persists or intensifies, encourage him to seek professional help to address his insecurities and trust issues. Couples therapy could also be beneficial for addressing these concerns together.
Consider Your Well-being: Take some time to reflect on how his behavior makes you feel and whether it aligns with what you want in a healthy and respectful relationship. Your emotional well-being is essential, and it's okay to prioritize yourself if the relationship becomes emotionally draining or toxic.
Seek Support: If you find it challenging to deal with the situation on your own, consider talking to friends, family, or a counselor for support and guidance.
Remember, a healthy relationship is built on trust, respect, and open communication. If your boyfriend's behavior doesn't change and continues to negatively impact your well-being, you might need to reevaluate the relationship and consider whether it's the right fit for you in the long run. It's essential to prioritize your emotional health and be in a relationship where you feel valued and respected.