It's understandable that you may be feeling frustrated and confused by your ex's continued anger and unwillingness to let go of past issues, especially since you have apologized and attempted to rectify the situation. While I can't know the specifics of your ex's feelings and thoughts, there are some general reasons why they might still be holding onto their anger:
Emotional wounds take time to heal: Depending on the circumstances and the emotional impact of what was said during the breakup, it's possible that your ex is still dealing with the hurt and pain caused by those words. Healing from emotional wounds isn't always a linear process, and it can take time for someone to come to terms with their feelings and move on.
Difficulty in forgiving: Forgiveness is a complex process, and some people find it harder to let go of hurtful experiences than others. It's possible that your ex is struggling to forgive you, even though you've apologized. Forgiveness is not just about saying sorry; it involves rebuilding trust and demonstrating consistent change over time.
Residual feelings: Lingering anger might be a sign that your ex still has unresolved feelings for you or has not fully moved on from the relationship. In such cases, the emotions attached to the breakup can make it challenging for them to forgive and forget.
Communication breakdown: There could be a breakdown in communication, and your ex might not feel heard or understood. Even though you've apologized, they might still feel that their emotions haven't been acknowledged or validated.
Personal growth and change: While you've taken back what you said and apologized, your ex might still need to see tangible evidence of your personal growth and change. Words alone may not be enough to convince them that the same issues won't arise again in the future.
Trust issues: Trust may have been broken during the relationship or the breakup, and rebuilding trust takes time and consistent effort. Your ex may be hesitant to fully forgive and move forward due to these trust issues.
Coping with the breakup: Sometimes, people use unresolved issues as a way to cope with the pain of a breakup. Focusing on past grievances can be a defense mechanism to avoid dealing with the emotional aftermath of the relationship ending.
It's essential to remember that everyone processes emotions differently, and healing timelines vary from person to person. If you genuinely want to address the situation and potentially repair the relationship, consider having an open and honest conversation with your ex. Listen to their perspective and try to understand their feelings without becoming defensive. Be patient and empathetic, recognizing that rebuilding trust and moving forward may take time.
However, it's also crucial to recognize that there might come a point where you need to accept that your ex may not be ready or willing to move past the issues. In such cases, it's essential to focus on your own personal growth and well-being, allowing yourself to heal and move forward in a positive direction.