In general, it's challenging to make blanket statements about what any specific individual, including a covert narcissist, might think or feel in a given situation. Narcissism exists on a spectrum, and people with narcissistic traits can react differently based on their unique personalities and circumstances. However, we can explore some common possible reactions a covert narcissist might have when their ex-wife and ex-girlfriend become friends:
Feeling Threatened: Covert narcissists can be deeply insecure and fear losing control or influence over people in their lives. If their ex-wife and ex-girlfriend become friends, the narcissist might feel threatened that their two former partners could share negative experiences or insights about their behavior, which could tarnish their carefully crafted image.
Jealousy and Envy: A covert narcissist may feel envious of the newfound friendship between their ex-wife and ex-girlfriend. The narcissist might want to be the center of attention and feel jealous that they are no longer the primary focus of these individuals.
Seeking Validation: Narcissists crave admiration and validation. If their ex-wife and ex-girlfriend are becoming friends, the narcissist might perceive it as a sign that both women still value their opinion and seek their approval. This could feed the narcissist's need for significance.
Attempts at Manipulation: Covert narcissists are skilled at manipulation and may try to exploit any opportunity to maintain control or exert power over others. If they perceive their ex-wife and ex-girlfriend's friendship as a threat, they might attempt to sow discord between the two or manipulate situations to regain their influence.
Victim Mentality: Some narcissists adopt a victim mentality, where they see themselves as the ones who have been wronged or mistreated. If their ex-wife and ex-girlfriend become friends, the narcissist might see this as another example of people "ganging up" against them or not understanding their perspective.
Indifference or Dismissal: On the other hand, a covert narcissist might respond with indifference or dismissal. They might downplay the significance of the friendship or convince themselves that it doesn't matter to them, especially if they believe they can still assert control in other ways.
It's essential to remember that each individual and their experiences are unique, and not all people with narcissistic traits will react in the same way. Additionally, the emotions and actions of a covert narcissist may not align with healthy or empathetic responses.
If you find yourself dealing with a situation involving a narcissistic ex-partner, it's crucial to prioritize your emotional well-being and set healthy boundaries. Seeking support from friends, family, or a mental health professional can be helpful in navigating such challenging dynamics.