Feeling anger and hurt when you remember how badly your ex-boyfriend treated you is a normal and understandable reaction, especially if the mistreatment was significant and had a lasting impact on you. These emotions are valid, and they don't necessarily mean that you're not over the relationship. It's essential to acknowledge and process these feelings as part of the healing journey.
Healing from a past relationship takes time, and it's not uncommon for emotions to resurface, even after a significant amount of time has passed. The emotional wounds may still be sensitive, and certain triggers, such as memories or reminders of the mistreatment, can bring those feelings back to the surface.
Here are some steps you can take to help with the healing process:
Allow yourself to feel: Don't suppress or deny your emotions. It's okay to feel angry, hurt, or sad about what happened. Give yourself permission to experience and process these emotions.
Seek support: Talk to friends, family, or a therapist about your feelings. Sharing your experiences with someone you trust can provide validation and perspective.
Practice self-compassion: Be kind to yourself and recognize that healing takes time. Avoid being too hard on yourself for having lingering emotions.
Focus on personal growth: Use this time to invest in yourself, your hobbies, and your interests. Engage in activities that bring you joy and help you grow as an individual.
Establish healthy boundaries: If your ex-boyfriend's behavior is still affecting you, consider limiting or cutting off contact with him. Creating distance can aid in the healing process.
Challenge negative thoughts: If you find yourself ruminating on negative thoughts, try to reframe them or focus on more positive aspects of your life.
Remember, healing is a process, and it's okay to have good days and bad days. Gradually, with time and self-care, the intensity of these negative emotions will likely lessen. If you find that you are continuously struggling to cope or that the emotions are interfering with your daily life, consider seeking support from a professional therapist or counselor. They can help you navigate through the healing process and provide valuable guidance.