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It's important to be cautious when labeling someone as a narcissist, as diagnosing a personality disorder requires professional expertise. However, if you believe your ex-partner displayed narcissistic traits, it's possible that he is now struggling to control his new girlfriend for various reasons:

  1. Initial idealization phase: Narcissists often idealize and love-bomb their partners at the beginning of a relationship to gain their trust and admiration. During this stage, the new girlfriend may not see any controlling behavior as it may not be apparent or may be masked by affection and charm.

  2. Changing dynamics: As the relationship progresses and the initial honeymoon phase fades, the narcissist might start asserting control and manipulation over their partner. However, not every partner will tolerate or submit to such behavior, and the new girlfriend may be more assertive or have stronger boundaries.

  3. Different vulnerabilities: Each person in a relationship has different vulnerabilities, and the narcissist may not be able to exploit the same weaknesses in the new girlfriend that they could in you. She might have a stronger support system, higher self-esteem, or less tolerance for abusive behavior.

  4. Awareness or previous experiences: The new girlfriend might be aware of narcissistic traits or may have had past experiences with controlling individuals, making her more vigilant and less likely to fall victim to manipulation.

  5. Narcissistic supply: Narcissists crave attention, admiration, and validation (narcissistic supply). If they find a steady source of supply in their new partner, they may not feel the need to exert as much control over her.

  6. Different goals: It's possible that the new girlfriend's goals and priorities align more with the narcissist's, making it easier for him to maintain the relationship without resorting to excessive control.

Remember that each person and relationship is unique, so the dynamics between your ex-partner and his new girlfriend may differ significantly from your previous relationship. It's essential to focus on your own healing and well-being rather than trying to analyze or influence their relationship. If you believe your ex displayed abusive or harmful behavior during your relationship, consider seeking support from friends, family, or a therapist to help you navigate the healing process.

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