Dealing with a narcissistic ex can be extremely challenging due to their complex and manipulative behavior. It's important to remember that narcissists often have a distorted sense of self-worth and can be highly skilled at manipulating others to get what they want.
There could be several reasons why your narcissistic ex is suddenly expressing love and trying to get you back:
Loss of control: Narcissists crave control and power over others. Your new relationship and the fact that you are moving on without them may threaten their sense of control, leading them to try to regain influence over you.
Ego boost: Your ex may see your new relationship as a blow to their ego. By trying to win you back, they seek validation and a boost to their self-esteem.
Fear of abandonment: Deep down, many narcissists have a fear of being abandoned or rejected. Your rejection of them and moving on with someone else might trigger this fear, leading them to desperately try to get you back.
Manipulative tactics: Narcissists are skilled manipulators, and their sudden "love" and affection may be just another tactic to lure you back into the relationship, where they can exert control over you once again.
Jealousy and revenge: The fact that your new boyfriend confronted and beat up your ex could be fueling their desire for revenge or jealousy, leading them to act out and try to win you back as a way to "win" over your new partner.
It's important to be cautious and not fall for their manipulative tactics. Re-establishing contact with a narcissistic ex can be emotionally damaging and may lead to more harm in the long run.
Here are some steps you can take to protect yourself:
Maintain No Contact: Consider implementing a strict "No Contact" rule, blocking their emails, texts, and social media. Avoid engaging with them or responding to their attempts to contact you.
Focus on your well-being: Concentrate on your own healing and growth. Surround yourself with supportive friends and family, and consider seeking the help of a therapist to navigate through the emotional aftermath of the relationship.
Set strong boundaries: If you must communicate with your ex for any reason (e.g., shared responsibilities), establish clear and firm boundaries to protect yourself from manipulation and emotional abuse.
Avoid self-blame: Remember that their behavior is a reflection of their issues, not yours. Narcissists often try to shift blame onto others, but it's essential to recognize that their actions are not your fault.
Seek professional support: Dealing with a narcissistic ex can be emotionally draining. Seeking the help of a therapist or counselor who specializes in narcissistic abuse can be beneficial in understanding and overcoming the dynamics of such a relationship.
Remember, your well-being is the most important thing. Don't hesitate to distance yourself from toxic individuals and seek support to help you heal and move forward in a healthy and positive direction.