Feeling anxious, shaking, or experiencing intense emotional reactions when around an emotionally abusive parent is not uncommon, especially if you have experienced consistent emotional trauma in the past. Emotional abuse can be just as damaging as physical abuse and can have lasting effects on an individual's mental and emotional well-being.
It's crucial to recognize that your feelings are valid, and you are not alone in experiencing this type of reaction. Emotional abuse can create a profound impact on a person's sense of self-worth, self-esteem, and ability to trust others. The fear and anxiety you feel around your dad might be a result of the emotional trauma you've endured.
Gaslighting and emotional manipulation are common tactics used by emotionally abusive individuals, which can lead victims to doubt their own feelings and experiences. Feeling like you might be "faking it" is a common response for those who have experienced emotional abuse. These feelings are a part of the trauma response and can be addressed through therapy and support.
Consider seeking help from a therapist who specializes in trauma and emotional abuse. A professional can provide a safe and non-judgmental space for you to explore your feelings, process the emotional trauma, and develop coping strategies to manage the anxiety and fear you experience around your dad.
Remember, healing from emotional abuse takes time, and it's okay to seek help and support to navigate the process. You deserve to be heard, validated, and supported on your healing journey. Reach out to friends, family, or support groups to find additional sources of understanding and encouragement. You are not alone, and with the right support, healing and recovery are possible.