Feelings are complex, and there is no one-size-fits-all answer to this question. It's entirely normal to experience a mix of emotions when someone you knew, even if they were a bully, passes away. Here are some factors to consider:
Impact on you: Reflect on how this person's actions affected you. If you were deeply hurt or traumatized by their bullying, it's understandable if you don't feel a strong sense of sadness at their passing.
Empathy: Despite their negative behavior, it's okay to acknowledge that they were human too, with their struggles and challenges. Feeling empathy for someone's struggles doesn't mean you condone their actions, but it can provide context for your emotions.
Closure: The person's death might bring up unresolved feelings or memories related to the bullying. It could be an opportunity to process those emotions and seek closure, whether through self-reflection or speaking with a therapist.
Forgiveness: Forgiveness is a personal choice and can be a part of healing. However, it's essential to remember that forgiveness does not mean you have to forget the harm done to you or condone the bullying.
Mixed emotions: It's normal to experience a mix of emotions in situations like this. Conflicting feelings of relief, guilt, or confusion can arise.
Ultimately, what matters most is how you process and cope with these emotions. If you find it difficult to navigate these feelings on your own, consider talking to a therapist or counselor. They can provide support and guidance in understanding and managing your emotions in a healthy way. Remember that everyone's feelings are unique and valid, so there is no right or wrong way to feel about this situation. Be kind to yourself and allow yourself the time and space to process your emotions in a healthy and compassionate manner.