I'm sorry to hear that you're experiencing this difficult situation with your mom. Verbal abuse can be emotionally distressing and harmful, and it can be challenging to understand why someone would behave this way, especially when they act like nothing happened afterward.
There could be various reasons for such behavior:
Emotional Regulation Issues: Your mom might have difficulty managing her emotions, and her verbal abuse could be a result of her own unresolved issues and frustrations. Afterward, she might try to ignore or deny the situation as a way to cope with her emotions or avoid facing the consequences of her actions.
Lack of Awareness: Some people may not realize the extent of the harm they cause through their words or actions. They might not fully comprehend the impact of their behavior on others.
Cycle of Abuse: In some cases, individuals who have experienced abuse themselves may perpetuate the cycle of abuse unintentionally. They may have learned harmful behaviors from their own upbringing.
Power and Control: Verbal abuse can sometimes be a tactic used by individuals to exert power and control over others. Afterward, they may act like nothing happened to maintain their control or avoid accountability.
Guilt and Shame: Your mom might feel guilty or ashamed of her behavior after the fact, leading her to pretend like nothing happened to avoid facing those uncomfortable emotions.
Denial: Some individuals might use denial as a defense mechanism to protect themselves from the reality of their actions. They might suppress or dismiss the memory of their abusive behavior.
Regardless of the reasons, it's essential to remember that none of them justify or excuse verbal abuse. It's crucial to prioritize your well-being and safety. If you find it challenging to cope with the situation, consider seeking support from a trusted friend, family member, counselor, or therapist who can help you navigate through these challenges.
Communication is also essential. If you feel safe doing so, try to talk to your mom about her behavior and its impact on you. However, if the situation becomes unsafe or overwhelming, it might be best to seek help from a professional or a support organization specializing in abuse and family dynamics. They can provide guidance and resources to assist you in addressing the situation effectively. Remember that you have the right to be treated with respect and kindness.