I can offer some general advice on dealing with the effects of past emotional abuse from an older brother or anyone else:
Recognize the impact: Acknowledge that emotional abuse can have long-lasting effects on a person's emotional well-being and self-esteem. Understanding the impact of abuse is the first step in addressing its effects.
Seek support: Talk to someone you trust about your experiences, such as a close friend, family member, or a therapist. Sharing your feelings and experiences with a supportive person can be cathartic and help you process the emotions tied to the past abuse.
Set boundaries: Establish clear boundaries with your older brother to protect yourself from further emotional harm. This may involve limiting contact with him or clearly communicating what behaviors are not acceptable.
Practice self-compassion: Be kind to yourself and avoid blaming yourself for the abuse. Recognize that you were not at fault and deserve to be treated with respect and dignity.
Consider therapy: Engage in therapy or counseling to work through the emotional wounds caused by the abuse. A trained professional can help you develop coping strategies, process difficult emotions, and foster healing.
Build a support network: Surround yourself with positive and caring individuals who uplift and support you. Having a strong support network can make a significant difference in healing from past trauma.
Engage in self-care: Prioritize self-care activities that promote your emotional and mental well-being. This can include exercise, hobbies, meditation, spending time in nature, or engaging in creative pursuits.
Challenge negative beliefs: Challenge any negative beliefs about yourself that may have resulted from the emotional abuse. Replace them with positive affirmations and thoughts that support your self-esteem.
Forgiveness (if appropriate): Forgiveness can be a complex and personal process, but it may help to release the emotional burden associated with past abuse. However, forgiveness does not mean condoning the abusive behavior or maintaining a close relationship with the abuser.
Focus on personal growth: Concentrate on your personal growth and development. Setting and achieving personal goals can empower you and create a sense of accomplishment.
Remember, healing from emotional abuse is a journey, and it may take time. Be patient with yourself and allow yourself to process your emotions at your own pace. If you find that the emotional impact of the abuse is significantly affecting your daily life and well-being, don't hesitate to seek professional help from a therapist or counselor who specializes in trauma and abuse.