It's crucial to recognize that the behaviors you described are characteristic of an eating disorder and/or food phobia, and they can have serious implications for your physical and mental health. It's essential to seek professional help from a healthcare provider, therapist, or counselor experienced in treating eating disorders and anxiety-related issues.
Here are some steps you can consider taking to address your gross ED/phobia behaviors:
Reach out for professional help: Don't hesitate to seek support from a healthcare professional who specializes in eating disorders and anxiety. They can provide you with a proper diagnosis, guidance, and a personalized treatment plan.
Keep a food diary: Start tracking your thoughts and behaviors related to food and eating. This can help you and your healthcare provider identify patterns and triggers that contribute to your behaviors.
Challenge negative thoughts: Work with a therapist to identify and challenge negative thought patterns associated with your eating behaviors. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) can be helpful in this regard.
Gradual exposure: Under the guidance of a professional, consider gradual exposure to foods that trigger your phobia. This exposure therapy can help desensitize your anxiety response over time.
Practice mindfulness: Engage in mindfulness techniques to become more aware of your thoughts and feelings surrounding food and eating. This can help you develop a healthier relationship with food.
Build a support system: Share your struggles with trusted friends or family members who can offer support and encouragement. Joining a support group can also be beneficial, as you'll be able to connect with others who understand what you're going through.
Focus on nutrition: Work with a registered dietitian to develop a balanced and healthy meal plan that meets your nutritional needs. Having a structured eating plan can help reduce anxiety around food.
Be patient with yourself: Recovery from an eating disorder takes time, and setbacks may occur. Be kind to yourself during this process and remember that healing is a journey.
Starting school can indeed be stressful, especially when dealing with eating-related issues. Informing your school about your struggles and seeking accommodations if necessary might be helpful. Additionally, try to identify a safe and comfortable space where you can eat during school hours.
Remember, professional help is vital in addressing and overcoming eating disorders and phobias. Don't hesitate to take that important step towards seeking support, as it can significantly improve your quality of life and overall well-being.