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Ending a romantic attachment to someone who physically and mentally abuses you can be a difficult and challenging process. Here are some steps to help you move forward:

  1. Acknowledge the Abuse: Recognize and accept that you are in an abusive relationship. It is crucial to understand that abuse is not acceptable and that you deserve to be treated with respect and kindness.

  2. Reach Out for Support: Talk to friends, family, or a support group about your situation. Sharing your experiences with others can provide emotional support and help you feel less isolated.

  3. Prioritize Your Safety: If you are in immediate danger, prioritize your safety above all else. Consider reaching out to authorities or a domestic violence hotline for assistance.

  4. Seek Professional Help: Consult with a therapist or counselor experienced in abusive relationships. They can offer guidance, help you process your emotions, and assist you in developing a plan to move forward.

  5. Create a Safety Plan: If you are still in contact with the abusive person, create a safety plan for yourself. This plan should outline steps to protect yourself physically and emotionally, including identifying safe places to go and people you can trust.

  6. Limit Contact: Minimize contact with the abusive person as much as possible. Breaking off communication can be challenging, but it is essential for your healing and well-being.

  7. Focus on Self-Care: Take care of yourself during this difficult time. Engage in activities that promote your well-being, such as exercise, hobbies, spending time with supportive friends, and practicing relaxation techniques.

  8. Challenge Guilt and Blame: Abusive individuals often try to manipulate their victims into feeling guilty or believing they deserve the abuse. Recognize that the abuse is not your fault and that you deserve better.

  9. Set Clear Boundaries: If you must interact with the abusive person (e.g., due to shared responsibilities), set clear boundaries to protect yourself from further harm.

  10. Cut Ties: If it is safe to do so, consider cutting ties with the abusive person completely. Ending all contact can be a crucial step in healing and moving on.

  11. Avoid Idealization: Remind yourself of the negative aspects of the relationship and the harm caused by the abuse. It can be easy to focus on the good times and overlook the abusive behavior.

  12. Be Patient with Yourself: Healing from an abusive relationship takes time. Be patient and gentle with yourself throughout the process.

Remember, seeking support from friends, family, or professionals can be immensely beneficial as you work through the process of letting go of an abusive relationship. Prioritize your safety and well-being and take steps towards building a healthier and happier future for yourself.

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