Dissociation is a psychological defense mechanism that can be both voluntary and involuntary. When you find yourself being yelled at or experiencing high levels of stress, your mind might choose to dissociate as a way to cope with the overwhelming emotions and protect itself from the distressing situation. In this sense, it can feel like a voluntary action because your mind instinctively retreats from the intensity of the emotions and feelings.
The act of dissociation can create a sense of detachment and numbness, which can indeed provide temporary relief from the immediate distress. However, the difficulty in "turning back on" or reconnecting with your emotions and feelings after dissociating is because the protective mechanism of dissociation is still active.
Here are some reasons why it can be challenging to "turn back on" after dissociation:
Defense Mechanism Activation: Dissociation is triggered as a way to protect yourself from emotional overwhelm. When the threat or stressor is still present or perceived to be ongoing, the mind may continue to hold onto the dissociated state to maintain emotional distance and preserve your well-being.
Emotional Overload: If the situation that triggered the dissociation is highly distressing, your mind might be hesitant to reintegrate those emotions because it fears becoming overwhelmed by them again. It's a way of self-protection.
Habitual Response: If dissociation has become a habitual coping mechanism, your mind might automatically resort to it in stressful situations, making it challenging to shift back to a fully present and emotionally engaged state.
Lingering Anxiety: After dissociating, you might still feel anxious or uneasy about the situation that triggered the dissociation, making it harder to let go of the protective state and reconnect with your emotions.
Overcoming the Challenge of Reconnection:
Overcoming the challenge of reconnecting with your emotions after dissociation may require patience, self-compassion, and support. Here are some strategies that might help:
Mindfulness: Practicing mindfulness can help you become more aware of your emotional state and facilitate a gradual reconnection with your feelings.
Emotional Regulation Techniques: Learning and practicing healthy emotional regulation techniques can aid in managing overwhelming emotions when they start to resurface.
Therapy: Working with a therapist, especially one experienced in trauma or stress management, can provide you with the tools and support needed to process emotions and cope with dissociation more effectively.
Self-Care: Engage in self-care activities that promote relaxation and reduce stress, as this can support a more balanced emotional state.
Remember, the process of overcoming dissociation and reconnecting with your emotions is unique to each individual. Be patient with yourself and seek professional support if you find it challenging to cope with dissociation or its after-effects. With time, understanding, and the right tools, you can develop healthier coping mechanisms and improve your emotional well-being.