Feeling bad, empty, and not "sick enough" after sharing your depression with your best friend can be a complex emotional response, and there could be several reasons behind these feelings:
Vulnerability Hangover: Sharing something as personal as depression can make you feel vulnerable and exposed, especially if you're not used to discussing such emotions. After opening up, it's common to experience a "vulnerability hangover" where you may feel a mix of emotions, including regret or worry about how your friend might perceive you now.
Fear of Judgment: There might be a fear of judgment or rejection after disclosing your feelings. You might worry about how your friend views you now that they know about your depression, and this fear can lead to negative feelings.
Misunderstanding or Lack of Validation: If your friend's response wasn't as supportive or understanding as you had hoped, it could lead to feelings of emptiness or disappointment. Sometimes, people might not know how to react or respond appropriately to someone sharing their struggles, and this can leave the person opening up feeling invalidated.
Self-Stigma: Internalized stigma about mental health can make you believe that you should be able to handle your emotions on your own, leading to feelings of inadequacy or not being "sick enough" to warrant help.
Unresolved Emotions: Discussing depression can bring up underlying and unresolved emotions that you may not have fully processed, leading to feelings of emptiness.
Sense of Burden: You may feel guilty for burdening your friend with your problems, even if they were willing to listen and be supportive.
It's essential to remember that feelings are complex and can't always be neatly explained. It's entirely normal to have mixed emotions after sharing something as significant as your depression with someone close to you.
Here are some suggestions to help you navigate through these feelings:
Give Yourself Time: Allow yourself time to process the experience of sharing your feelings and let the emotions settle.
Talk It Out: If you feel comfortable, talk to your friend about how you're feeling after sharing your depression. Open communication can help clear up any misunderstandings and strengthen your bond.
Seek Professional Support: Consider reaching out to a mental health professional who can provide a safe and non-judgmental space to discuss your emotions and help you navigate through your feelings.
Practice Self-Compassion: Be kind to yourself and remember that it's okay to have complex emotions. Depression is a challenging experience, and you deserve understanding and support.
Challenge Negative Thoughts: If you're feeling not "sick enough," remind yourself that mental health struggles are valid and seeking support is essential, no matter the severity.
Remember, sharing your feelings with your best friend was a courageous step, and it's okay to feel a range of emotions afterward. Prioritize your well-being and consider seeking additional support if you find it challenging to cope with these emotions on your own.