Feeling delusional and constantly lying to oneself can be indicative of underlying psychological or emotional struggles. It's important to remember that I can't provide a definitive diagnosis or treatment, but I can suggest some possible reasons for such experiences:
Coping mechanism: Sometimes, people use self-deception as a way to cope with difficult emotions or situations. It might be a defense mechanism to protect yourself from facing painful realities or to maintain a sense of hope.
Escapism: When life becomes overwhelming or stressful, some individuals may turn to delusions or fantasies as a form of escapism from their problems or responsibilities.
Low self-esteem: People with low self-esteem may create false beliefs or lies about themselves to boost their confidence or feel better about their worth.
Mental health conditions: Delusions and self-deception can be symptoms of certain mental health conditions like depression, anxiety, or even some personality disorders.
Difficulty processing emotions: Struggling to process emotions and experiences can lead to creating false narratives to make sense of what's happening.
Regardless of the underlying cause, it's essential to seek support from a mental health professional. A licensed therapist or counselor can help you explore these feelings and experiences in a safe and non-judgmental space. They can work with you to understand the root causes of your self-deception and develop healthier coping strategies.
Additionally, consider talking to friends or family members you trust about what you're going through. Social support can be invaluable during difficult times.
Remember that seeking help is a sign of strength, and there are resources available to support you through this challenging period. If you ever feel overwhelmed or in crisis, don't hesitate to reach out to a crisis hotline or emergency services in your area.