If a guy asks you out but doesn't make an effort to plan the first date or can't decide on a place and time, it can be frustrating and might raise some concerns about his level of interest or initiative. Here are some steps you can take in such a situation:
Express your expectations: Politely let him know that you would appreciate it if he took the lead in planning the first date. Communication is crucial in any relationship, and expressing your preferences early on can help set the tone for how you want to be treated.
Be patient: If he seems indecisive or unsure, give him a little time to think things through. Some people may feel nervous or inexperienced with dating, and they might need some encouragement to take the lead.
Offer to collaborate: If he continues to struggle with planning, you can offer to collaborate on the date ideas. Suggest some specific options and see if he responds positively or if he has any preferences among the choices you presented.
Observe his behavior: Pay attention to how he responds to your suggestions and how much effort he puts into the date planning process. It can provide valuable insights into his level of interest and willingness to invest in the relationship.
Consider his reasons: There could be reasons behind his hesitation that are not immediately apparent. Maybe he's going through a busy or stressful time, or he might be unsure about dating in general. While these reasons are valid, it's essential to find a balance between understanding and making sure your needs are being met.
Evaluate compatibility: Reflect on whether his indecisiveness aligns with what you're looking for in a partner. Compatibility involves shared values, communication styles, and a willingness to invest in the relationship.
Set boundaries: If you feel like his lack of initiative is an ongoing issue that makes you uncomfortable, it's crucial to set boundaries and communicate your needs clearly. You deserve to be with someone who values and respects you, including putting effort into planning dates.
Be open to alternatives: If he doesn't step up and you feel unsatisfied with his level of interest or effort, consider whether this is a pattern you're willing to accept. If not, it might be best to move on and explore other opportunities with someone who is excited about getting to know you and invests in the relationship.
Remember, every person and relationship is unique, so it's essential to communicate openly, be patient, and evaluate the situation based on your own feelings and needs. Trust your instincts and make decisions that align with your values and desires.