Feeling like a girlfriend of convenience can be hurtful and frustrating, and it's essential to address these feelings in your relationship. Here are some steps you can consider taking:
Communicate openly: Sit down with your boyfriend and express your feelings calmly and honestly. Let him know how you've been feeling and how his lack of initiative in making plans has been impacting you. Avoid blaming or accusing language but focus on sharing your emotions and concerns.
Ask for his perspective: Give him a chance to explain his behavior and perspective. There might be reasons behind his actions that you are not aware of, such as stress, personal issues, or other factors affecting his behavior.
Listen actively: Hear his side of the story and try to understand where he's coming from. It's important to be open to his feelings and experiences as well.
Set boundaries and expectations: Clearly communicate what you need in the relationship. Let him know that you would like him to be more proactive in making plans and spending time together. Establishing boundaries and expectations can help both of you understand what the other person needs and wants from the relationship.
Observe his response and actions: After the conversation, observe if there are any changes in his behavior. Does he make an effort to initiate plans or spend more quality time with you? Actions often speak louder than words, and if he values the relationship, he should show it through his actions.
Evaluate the relationship: Take some time to assess whether this is an isolated issue or part of a pattern of behavior. Consider if this lack of effort and consideration is a recurring problem in other aspects of the relationship.
Consider seeking advice from friends or a therapist: If you're unsure about how to handle the situation or if the issue persists, it might be helpful to talk to close friends or seek the guidance of a professional therapist. They can offer objective insights and support.
Take care of yourself: Remember that you deserve to be in a relationship where you feel valued and appreciated. While it's essential to communicate and work on the relationship, it's also important to prioritize your own well-being.
Ultimately, healthy relationships are built on communication, mutual effort, and respect. If your boyfriend is willing to listen and make changes, there's hope for improvement. However, if the situation remains unchanged and you continue to feel unfulfilled, you may need to reevaluate whether this relationship is meeting your needs and if it's worth continuing.