I'm sorry to hear that you're going through this situation. Being called annoying and having your feelings invalidated can be hurtful and upsetting. Here are some steps you can take to address the issue:
Communicate your feelings: It's important to express how his words hurt you. Use "I" statements to convey your emotions without sounding accusatory. For example, say, "I felt hurt when you called me annoying and said I talk too much."
Express the need for respect: Let him know that you expect to be treated with respect and kindness in your relationship. Healthy communication involves expressing concerns without resorting to name-calling or belittling.
Listen to his perspective: Give him a chance to explain what he meant by his comment. Sometimes people say hurtful things without fully understanding the impact of their words. While it doesn't excuse the behavior, it may provide insight into his feelings or frustrations.
Set boundaries: If his comment is part of a pattern of disrespectful behavior, it's essential to set clear boundaries. Let him know that you won't tolerate being spoken to in a hurtful manner and that you expect to be treated with kindness and understanding.
Evaluate the relationship: Take some time to reflect on the overall dynamics of your relationship. If this is a one-time incident and he shows genuine remorse, it might be worth addressing and working through the issue together. However, if this behavior is a recurring pattern or you feel consistently disrespected, it may be a sign of deeper issues in the relationship.
Seek support from friends or family: Talk to someone you trust about what happened to gain perspective and emotional support. Sometimes an outside perspective can be helpful in understanding the situation better.
Consider couples counseling: If you both are willing, couples counseling can be beneficial in addressing communication issues and improving the overall health of the relationship.
Prioritize self-respect: Remember that you deserve to be in a relationship where you are treated with respect, kindness, and understanding. Don't be afraid to stand up for yourself and advocate for your emotional well-being.
Trust your instincts: Pay attention to how you feel in the relationship. If you consistently feel hurt, unvalued, or unhappy, it might be time to reevaluate whether this relationship is meeting your needs.
Be open to growth and change: Relationships require effort and willingness to address issues together. Be open to growth and change, both individually and as a couple.
Ultimately, the decision of how to proceed lies with you. If your partner is unwilling to acknowledge the hurtful behavior and work towards positive change, it may be time to consider whether the relationship is truly healthy and fulfilling for you. Remember that you deserve to be with someone who respects and appreciates you for who you are.