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I'm sorry to hear that you've experienced narcissistic abuse and are now struggling with feelings of revenge and wanting to stop yourself from becoming abusive. It's essential to prioritize your healing and well-being. Here are some steps you can take to get over this challenging situation:

  1. Recognize and accept your emotions: It's normal to feel hurt, angry, and betrayed after experiencing narcissistic abuse. Allow yourself to acknowledge and feel these emotions without judgment.

  2. Understand the cycle of abuse: Educate yourself about the cycle of abuse and how it can perpetuate from one person to another. Recognizing this pattern can help you break free from it.

  3. Seek professional help: Consider working with a therapist or counselor who specializes in abuse recovery, trauma, and emotional healing. They can provide a safe space for you to process your feelings, understand the root causes of your reactions, and learn healthier coping mechanisms.

  4. Practice self-compassion: Be kind and patient with yourself during this process. Healing from abuse takes time, and it's crucial to be gentle with yourself as you navigate through these challenging emotions.

  5. Channel your emotions positively: Instead of seeking revenge, channel your emotions into constructive activities. Engage in hobbies, exercise, or creative outlets that help you release stress and express yourself in a healthy manner.

  6. Establish boundaries: If the narcissistic abuser is still in your life or attempting to contact you, set clear boundaries to protect yourself. Limit or cut off contact if necessary for your emotional well-being.

  7. Surround yourself with support: Seek support from friends, family, or support groups. Connecting with others who have experienced similar situations can be comforting and validating.

  8. Practice mindfulness and self-awareness: Mindfulness practices can help you become more aware of your thoughts and emotions. This awareness can give you better control over your reactions and help prevent you from engaging in harmful behaviors.

  9. Forgive yourself and let go of revenge: Understand that seeking revenge will not bring true healing or closure. Focus on your own growth and well-being instead of trying to retaliate against the abuser.

  10. Avoid new relationships until you heal: Take time to focus on yourself and heal before entering into new relationships. Rushing into new connections without healing can lead to repeating harmful patterns.

  11. Consider a support group: Joining a support group for survivors of narcissistic abuse can provide valuable insights, empathy, and a sense of community during your healing journey.

Remember that healing from abuse is a process, and it's okay to take small steps towards recovery. Be patient with yourself, and don't hesitate to seek professional help if you find yourself struggling to cope with these emotions on your own. Healing is possible, and with the right support, you can break free from the cycle of abuse and create a healthier, more fulfilling life.

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