I'm really sorry to hear that you're going through such a difficult and painful situation. It's essential to prioritize your safety and well-being in any relationship. Dealing with emotional and physical abuse is never easy, and it's important to take appropriate steps to protect yourself. Here are some suggestions on what you can do:
Prioritize your safety: If you are experiencing physical abuse or fear for your safety, your immediate priority should be to remove yourself from any dangerous situations. Consider finding a safe place to stay or reaching out to friends or family who can offer support.
Seek professional help: Reach out to a therapist, counselor, or support group that specializes in abusive relationships. They can provide guidance, emotional support, and help you understand your options.
Set boundaries: Make it clear to your fiancée that her abusive behavior is not acceptable and that you will not tolerate it. Set firm boundaries for what behavior you will and will not accept in the relationship.
Communicate your concerns: If you feel safe doing so, have an open and honest conversation with your fiancée about the abuse and how it is affecting you. Sometimes, abusers might not be fully aware of the impact of their actions.
Consider a temporary separation: If possible, take some time apart to evaluate the relationship and your feelings. This can give both of you space to reflect on the situation and consider the next steps.
Reach out for support: Talk to friends, family, or a support network about what you're going through. Having a strong support system can be crucial during difficult times.
Gather evidence: If you decide to pursue legal action or require evidence of the abuse, document incidents as much as possible. This may include saving text messages, taking photos of injuries, or keeping a journal of abusive incidents.
Consult a legal professional: If you are considering ending the relationship or taking legal action, consult with a lawyer to understand your rights and options.
Focus on self-care: Take care of your physical and emotional well-being. Engage in activities that bring you joy and seek ways to reduce stress.
Consider ending the relationship: Ultimately, if the abuse continues and your fiancée does not seek help or show a genuine willingness to change, you may need to seriously consider ending the relationship for your own well-being.
Remember, it's not your responsibility to fix your fiancée's issues or tolerate abuse. While it's understandable that she had a difficult upbringing, it does not excuse abusive behavior. If she is willing to seek help and work on herself, that's a different situation, but you should never sacrifice your well-being for a relationship that is harmful.
If you are in immediate danger, please seek help from friends, family, or local authorities. Don't hesitate to reach out to a domestic violence hotline or a crisis center for immediate assistance.