Saying "oh stop your crying" or similar phrases is often used as a way to dismiss or minimize someone's emotions, particularly when they are expressing sadness or distress. It might seem to "work" on some people because of various psychological and social factors:
Social conditioning: From a young age, many individuals are taught to suppress emotions, especially negative ones like sadness or crying. Society often associates crying with weakness, and people may internalize this belief, leading them to try and stop crying when someone tells them to.
Desire for acceptance: People generally want to fit in and be accepted by others. If they perceive that crying is seen as undesirable or weak in their social circle, they may try to comply with the request to stop crying to avoid potential judgment or rejection.
Embarrassment: Crying in front of others can sometimes make people feel embarrassed or vulnerable. Being told to stop crying may prompt them to try to regain their composure to avoid further embarrassment.
Seeking to be strong: Some individuals might want to project strength or resilience, especially in difficult situations. They might interpret being asked to stop crying as a way to encourage them to be strong and composed.
Distraction: In some cases, when someone tells another person to stop crying, it may distract them momentarily from the cause of their sadness or distress, allowing them to regain their composure.
However, it's crucial to recognize that asking someone to stop crying is not a healthy or empathetic way to handle their emotions. Emotions are a natural part of being human, and it's essential to allow people to express and process them in their own way.
A more supportive approach would be to listen, offer comfort, and validate their feelings. Showing empathy and understanding can help someone feel heard and supported, leading to healthier emotional processing and potentially fostering stronger connections between individuals. Encouraging open communication about emotions can contribute to a more compassionate and emotionally healthy society.