It's completely normal to desire a sense of closeness and connection with your therapist, especially when you're going through a challenging and vulnerable process in therapy. Trust and rapport with your therapist are essential for effective therapy outcomes. However, it's essential to approach this topic with caution and consider the therapeutic framework in which your therapist operates.
Since your therapist follows a psychodynamic model, their approach might involve maintaining some professional distance and boundaries to facilitate a safe therapeutic environment. Psychodynamic therapy emphasizes exploring the unconscious and the dynamics between the therapist and client, which means that discussing the therapeutic relationship itself can be a part of the process.
Before expressing your desire for closeness, take some time to reflect on what "feeling close" means to you. Is it emotional support, validation, or a sense of safety and understanding? This self-reflection can help you articulate your needs more effectively when you talk to your therapist.
When discussing this topic with your therapist, consider the following:
Timing: Choose a moment in therapy when you feel comfortable and safe to discuss your feelings. Bringing it up during a regular session may be more appropriate than waiting for an intense emotional moment.
Openness: Be open and honest about your feelings while understanding that your therapist might respond in a way that prioritizes the therapeutic process.
Boundaries: Recognize that your therapist's approach might involve maintaining some boundaries, and expressing your desire for closeness doesn't necessarily mean the therapist will change their approach.
Exploration: Your therapist may explore these feelings with you, helping you understand their origin and significance in the context of your past experiences and relationships.
Communication: Be prepared for your therapist to discuss the therapeutic relationship and how the desire for closeness might relate to other areas of your life and your past.
Remember that discussing your feelings for your therapist is a valid part of the therapeutic process, and a skilled therapist will handle the conversation with sensitivity and professionalism. They will work with you to explore and understand these feelings in the context of your therapy and broader life experiences. Ultimately, the goal is to support your growth and healing within the therapeutic framework.
If you find it challenging to discuss this with your current therapist or feel that your needs are not being met, it's also okay to consider seeking a second opinion or exploring other therapeutic approaches with a different therapist. The therapeutic relationship is crucial, and finding the right fit is essential for your progress in therapy.