I'm really sorry to hear that you've been dealing with this difficult situation. It's essential to prioritize your safety and well-being, and being in a relationship with someone who is verbally abusive can be emotionally challenging and harmful.
It's positive that your husband has made some changes and is no longer physically abusive, but it's crucial to recognize that verbal abuse is still harmful and not acceptable behavior in a healthy relationship. Apologies are essential, but they should be accompanied by sincere efforts to change and improve one's behavior.
Here are some steps you can consider taking:
Communication: When both of you are calm, have an open and honest conversation about the impact of his verbal abuse on you and your relationship. Let him know how it makes you feel and that you are not willing to accept that behavior.
Encourage Professional Help: Suggest that both of you attend couples counseling or individual therapy. A professional therapist can help explore the underlying issues contributing to his verbal abuse and provide tools for better communication and anger management.
Set Boundaries: Establish clear boundaries about what behavior is acceptable and what is not. Be consistent in enforcing these boundaries. If he becomes verbally abusive, calmly remove yourself from the situation if possible.
Practice Calming Techniques: Help your husband find healthier ways to cope with his emotions. This may include deep breathing exercises, mindfulness techniques, physical activities, or hobbies that can help him de-stress.
Support System: Reach out to friends, family, or support groups who can provide you with emotional support and guidance during this challenging time.
Safety Plan: If you ever feel unsafe or fear for your well-being, have a safety plan in place to protect yourself. This might involve staying with a friend or family member, contacting a domestic violence helpline, or seeking a safe place to stay.
Ultimatums and Accountability: If your husband continues to be verbally abusive despite your efforts to help him change, consider setting clear boundaries and consequences. It may be necessary to seek separation or divorce if the behavior persists and poses a risk to your well-being.
Remember, you cannot change someone else's behavior; they have to be willing to change themselves. It's important to take care of yourself emotionally and physically. If your husband genuinely wants to change, he must take responsibility for his actions and actively work on improving his behavior.
If you're unsure about what steps to take or need support, consider speaking with a therapist or counselor who specializes in relationships and domestic violence. They can provide personalized guidance and support for your specific situation.