Healing from complex post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is a complex and individual process, and there is no one-size-fits-all answer to whether you should forget or confront the thing you fear. Both approaches have their merits, and the best course of action depends on your specific situation and needs. Here are some considerations for each approach:
1. Forgetting (Emotional Distancing):
- Pros: Forgetting or emotionally distancing yourself from traumatic memories can provide temporary relief from overwhelming emotions and distress. It might help you function better in daily life and reduce immediate anxiety.
- Cons: Avoiding or suppressing traumatic memories may lead to unresolved trauma, and the emotions associated with it can resurface later, potentially causing further distress and symptoms in the future.
2. Confronting (Processing and Integrating):
- Pros: Confronting and processing traumatic memories with the help of a qualified therapist can lead to long-term healing. It allows you to understand and make sense of your experiences, reduce the emotional charge, and integrate the trauma into your life story.
- Cons: Confronting traumatic memories can be emotionally intense and may temporarily increase distress before improvements are observed. It requires a safe and supportive therapeutic environment.
In most cases, a comprehensive approach that combines elements of both forgetting and confronting might be the most effective. Here's a balanced approach that you can consider:
1. Establish Safety and Coping Skills: Prioritize creating a safe and stable environment for yourself. Develop healthy coping skills to manage distressing emotions and symptoms.
2. Gradual Exposure: Instead of immediate and intense confrontation, consider a gradual exposure approach with the support of a therapist. This can involve discussing and processing the trauma at a pace that feels manageable for you.
3. Mindfulness Techniques: Incorporate mindfulness techniques to help you stay grounded in the present moment and manage overwhelming emotions as they arise.
4. Seek Professional Help: Working with a therapist experienced in trauma therapy, such as trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (TF-CBT) or Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), can be highly beneficial for healing from complex PTSD.
5. Patience and Self-Compassion: Healing from complex PTSD is a journey that takes time. Be patient with yourself and practice self-compassion as you navigate the healing process.
Remember that everyone's healing journey is unique, so it's crucial to find an approach that suits your individual needs and comfort level. Seeking the support of a qualified mental health professional is essential to guide you through this process and provide personalized care.