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When your therapist says you "deflect" when he asks questions, it means that you tend to avoid answering directly or providing genuine and open responses. Instead of addressing the questions directly, you may change the subject, use humor to divert the conversation, or give vague responses that don't provide much insight into your thoughts and feelings.

Deflection is a common defense mechanism that people use to protect themselves from uncomfortable or emotionally challenging topics. It can be a way to avoid facing difficult emotions or confronting underlying issues. By deflecting, you may inadvertently hinder the therapeutic process because the therapist relies on honest and open communication to help you explore and understand your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors.

When you deflect, it can make it harder for the therapist to gain a comprehensive understanding of your concerns and challenges, which may limit their ability to offer effective support and guidance. It is crucial for therapy to be a safe and non-judgmental space where you can be open and honest, even if it feels uncomfortable at times.

If you find yourself deflecting during therapy sessions, it could be helpful to reflect on why you might be doing so. It may be due to fear of vulnerability, discomfort with the topic being discussed, or uncertainty about how to express your feelings. By recognizing this tendency, you can work with your therapist to explore and understand the reasons behind your deflection, which can lead to deeper self-awareness and progress in therapy.

It's completely okay to bring up this topic with your therapist during your next session. Let them know that you've been thinking about their comment and that you would like to explore it further. Honest and open communication with your therapist will enhance the therapeutic relationship and make the process more effective. Remember, therapy is a collaborative process, and your therapist is there to support you in your journey of self-discovery and growth.

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