Question

My therapist called me, telling me that I hurt her feelings (because I said I felt detached to her). She always contacts me outside of sessions & we have 2 hour sessions. Is this unethical? Is she too emotionally attached?

Answer 1

It's essential to consider a few points when evaluating the situation you described:

1. Therapist Boundaries: Therapists are trained to establish appropriate boundaries with their clients. Contacting clients outside of scheduled sessions should generally be limited to specific situations like scheduling changes or emergencies. Regular communication outside of sessions might be considered crossing professional boundaries.

2. Session Length: Two-hour sessions can be uncommon, as most therapy sessions typically last around 50 minutes to an hour. Extended sessions might have valid reasons, but it's essential to understand the purpose and appropriateness of longer sessions in your specific case.

3. Emotional Attachment: Therapists should maintain professional boundaries to ensure the therapeutic relationship remains focused on the client's well-being rather than the therapist's emotions. Feeling emotionally attached to a client can potentially impact the objectivity and effectiveness of the therapy.

4. Sharing Feelings: While therapists are human and can have emotions, it is generally not appropriate for a therapist to burden their clients with their feelings or make them feel responsible for their emotional state. Therapy should prioritize the client's needs and emotions.

Regarding the ethical aspects, it's challenging to make a definitive judgment without knowing the full context and the specific guidelines of your therapist's professional association. Therapists adhere to ethical codes established by their respective licensing boards or professional organizations. These codes provide guidance on maintaining appropriate boundaries, confidentiality, and ensuring the client's well-being.

If you have concerns about the therapist's conduct, it's essential to address them openly with the therapist directly. If you still feel uncomfortable or uncertain, you may want to consider seeking a second opinion from another mental health professional or reaching out to the therapist's licensing board or professional organization to inquire about the appropriateness of the situation.

Remember that the therapeutic relationship should be built on trust, respect, and a focus on your well-being. If you have doubts or discomfort, it's essential to explore those feelings to ensure you have the best therapeutic experience possible.